Tender, bold, and deeply human, Kissing Girls on Shabbat explores love, silence, and selfhood in the face of communal constraints, with beauty and fierce honesty.

SYNOPSIS

Dr. Sara Glass begins her mem­oir by relat­ing a mem­o­ry: she and her friend Das­sa, who ​“on the out­side” looked like ​“the oth­er col­lege-aged Ortho­dox Jew­ish young women in Bor­ough Park,” fell in love with each oth­er as they par­tic­i­pat­ed in the shid­duch process. Glass writes with ten­der­ness, great care, and affec­tion. She ren­ders the ear­ly sto­ry of her rela­tion­ship with Das­sa beau­ti­ful­ly. The inti­ma­cy and yearn­ing between the two young women is pro­found and moving.

Although struc­tural­ly Kiss­ing Girls on Shab­bat is a com­ing-out nar­ra­tive, open­ing with a teenage love sto­ry and con­clud­ing with being out in the world, what makes it unique is that it places queer­ness in a broad­er con­ver­sa­tion about the con­straints that peo­ple encounter in the world and how they nav­i­gate them. At its heart, this mem­oir is a sto­ry of a woman and her fam­i­ly, and where and how their Ortho­dox com­mu­ni­ty serves and fails them. Glass explores her sister’s strug­gle with man­ic depres­sion, an ulti­mate­ly incur­able dis­ease that takes her in and out of hos­pi­tals from a young age. She also writes about her mother’s strug­gle with depres­sion, observ­ing, ​“I knew that she did not mean to live inside of tombs, that she did not choose to have a mind that was shroud­ed by demons.” Both les­bian­ism and men­tal ill­ness dri­ve a wedge between Glass and her Ortho­dox communities.

The rich­est nar­ra­tives in Kiss­ing Girls on Shab­bat are the ones that inves­ti­gate the effects of silences and taboos in fam­i­lies. In the final third of the book, Glass writes, ​“I was so over shov­ing entire parts of the human expe­ri­ence under the rug, out of sight.” This call for open­ness, for a life unshroud­ed and exam­ined, is the emo­tion­al heart of the book. Kiss­ing Girls on Shab­bat is a sto­ry about find­ing the courage to be one­self and live open­ly in the world — but it is also a sto­ry about Glass’s com­mit­ment to rais­ing her chil­dren to be open, lov­ing, and thought­ful human beings. The mem­oir leaves us with a num­ber of ques­tions: how do reli­gious com­mu­ni­ties build more space for a diver­si­ty of human expe­ri­ences? And how do peo­ple who have life expe­ri­ences out­side of what is nar­row­ly pre­scribed engage with reli­gion and reli­gious com­mu­ni­ties? Glass offers some insights and reflec­tions, but she leaves plen­ty of room for fur­ther exploration.

Meet author, Sara Glass, when she visits Tidewater on June 25, 2025.

 

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WHY WE LOVE THIS BOOK

I couldn’t put it down. Kissing Girls on Shabbat is all about the strength and bravery of one young woman as she goes against the odds to find her true self. This is a book I will encourage my daughters and granddaughters to read.

Nili Belkin
Member of OST Book Club

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Dr. Sara Glass, PhD, LCSW, is a psychotherapist, author, and speaker dedicated to empowering members of the queer community and individuals who have survived trauma to live bold, honest, and proud lives. She serves as the Clinical Director of Soul Wellness NYC, a private psychotherapy practice in Midtown Manhattan, and as a Clinical Supervisor for Jewish Queer Youth, a nonprofit organization supporting LGBTQ youth. Glass has specific expertise in treating complex trauma and PTSD, providing art and play therapy to children and adolescents, as well as general experience treating a range of human struggles such as anxiety, depression, relationship challenges, and stress. Her memoir, Kissing Girls on Shabbat, covers themes related to mental health and the intersection between queer identity and religiosity. 

Glass’s memoir, Kissing Girls on Shabbat, has been described by The Washington Post as “a searing testament to the strength in claiming one’s destiny.” The book recounts her courageous journey of self-acceptance as a queer woman navigating life within and beyond the constraints of a Hasidic Jewish community. This poignant exploration of identity, resilience, and love resonates deeply with readers and shines a light on the universal struggle to embrace one’s true self.

Glass holds a PhD in Psychology from Capella University and a Master’s in Social Work from Rutgers University. She is a passionate advocate for mental health accessibility and frequently speaks at educational institutions, community organizations, and professional conferences. Her writing has appeared in Psychology Today and various academic publications.

As a speaker, Glass captivates audiences with her authentic storytelling and profound insights into self-acceptance, trauma, and resilience. Drawing on her memoir and her extensive experience as a trauma-focused psychotherapist, she engages audiences in meaningful discussions about navigating queer identity within conservative religious frameworks, reclaiming self-worth, and the transformative power of art and writing. Whether addressing the intersection of mental health and faith, the process of unlearning and relearning identity, or the healing from trauma, Glass inspires audiences to reflect, connect, and embrace their authentic selves.

Glass lives in Manhattan, New York. 

(description from simonspeakers.com/)